PS I love you
by Grey-wolf-girl
Summary: I don’t want Nagisa to be with another guy because I want to protect her, right? And yet, the image of some stranger with his arm around her makes my stomach twist painfully with a feeling that I know isn’t just brotherly love.


Hey! Star-chan speaking! So, I know that Valentine's Day was yesterday, and there will be a ton of fanfics like this probably coming in all at once, and the major readers will be busy reading, but please **REVIEW** because **REVIEW**s and people who **REVIEW** or leave **REVIEW**s for me make my day, as well as **REVIEW**ing and anything with the word **REVIEW** in it. :)

DISCLAIMER: No, the characters of Tomoya-kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun and Nagisa-chan don't belong to me. The anime Clannad doesn't belong to me. Heck, NOTHING belongs to me anymore!

* * *

Flowers. All around me. So many different colors; white, pink, purple, yellow, red. All beautiful, all perfectly shaped, all hiding different scents between their silky petals. It feels as if I'm falling, falling deeply into the velvety petals surrounding me, eternally enveloped in their heavenly perfumes…

"Tomoya-kun! _Tomoya-kun_!"

"What?!" My head jerks up from where it had been resting on the counter.

"Tomoya-kun, you really shouldn't sleep at work. You'll be fired if your boss catches you!" the speaker chides, her voice not as stern as one might expect.

"Ah, Nagisa, I wasn't sleeping; I was examining the counter for any…" – I search quickly through my mind for a palpable excuse – "For any microscopic bugs that might attempt to carry off the flowers."

Nagisa purses her lips but lets the incident pass. That's why I like her so much; she never can stay angry for more than a moment or two. She waltzes off to one corner of the shop to admire some pastel roses, the last of their kind. We've – by "we" I mean the flower shop where I work part-time – been extremely busy lately, tomorrow being Valentine's Day and all. Practically all of the roses are gone.

"Did you want to buy some flowers?" I ask, walking around the counter to join her.

"Oh!" she cries, and she whirls around to face me, a little confused and smiling widely. "Yes, please!"

I understand in that moment, just by reading her face, that she'd totally forgotten that she wanted flowers. Silly Nagisa. "Do you have anything in mind? I know red roses are always popular, very traditional, but you might want to-"

"No." Nagisa speaks bluntly, frowning again ever so slightly. "This has to be special." She walks around the entire shop twice, examining each flower. A look of exultation crosses her face; she's come to her decision.

"I think…" Nagisa begins, "I think I'd like a big bunch of these red and pink roses here, with a single white rose in the very middle."

I nod. "Unusual."

Nagisa seems to agree with me. "I know, but… I heard that red roses symbolize love, pink ones a great frienship, and white ones a new friendship. So, I thought that seems appropriate."

I take out a little notepad and began to jot down the order. "Who're the flowers for?"

"The boy I like."

I blink and look up. A sudden, shapeless emotion just hit me hard in the stomach.

Nagisa doesn't meet my eyes as she continues, "He's always so kind to me, so gentle, so caring. Sometimes he's angry and mean, but I don't care. His faults just seem to make his good qualities all the more precious." She blushes and apologizes for running on.

I tell her it's quite alright, it doesn't matter, I don't mind, but I'm barely paying attention. My head's throbbing.

"Tomoya-kun? Are you alright? Do you want to sit down?" Nagisa's innocent, brown eyes peer at me worriedly, and I make an effort to calm myself.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Now, um… where were we? Oh yeah!" I look into her eyes. "So, who's the lucky guy?"

Nagisa blushes for the second time, twiddling her thumbs.

"Don't worry – I won't tell anyone. I just need to know who to deliver the flowers to on Valentine's Day. It is for Valentine's, isn't it? I suppose it is, since it's for the boy you like." I'm conscious that I'm rambling on a bit, but I don't make an effort to control it. There's too much to process…

"Actually, I was planning on giving them to him myself. At school, on Valentine's Day, like you said. Could I just pick them up the morning of?"

I nod and finish my note-taking. She pays promptly, and skips out the door.

Her receding form seems almost unreal as senseless thoughts flash through my brain. Nagisa's like my sister, we've always been close, so it's natural that I feel protective of her. That's all this feeling is, right? I'm just a little protective, I don't want her to be with another guy because I want to protect her, right? And yet, the image of some stranger with his arm around her slim shoulders makes my stomach twist painfully with a feeling that I know isn't just brotherly love.

Unable to stay in this place, I grab my jacket and slam the shop door behind me. Somewhere, in the back of my mind, I'm vaguely aware of my boss telling me to come back, but I don't care.

* * *

It's Valentine's Day. The cherry trees are in full bloom, concealing the town in their sweet-smelling aura. Everyone's excited as I make my way to school that morning. I, on the other hand, am anything but excited. My unexplainable bout of madness at my discovery of Nagisa's affections has died down, although I still can't help feeling a stifling, foreboding aura hanging upon my shoulders. So, I trudge to school on my own, stuck in my own little pool of misery.

As I put away my things in my locker, Nagisa enters the building. She's a little flushed, and, before she's engulfed by the other girls in the grade, I notice that she's carrying a large bouquet, carefully wrapped in decorated plastic. For some reason, this sight bothers me to no end, and I stalk off without greeting her.

I don't come back to my locker until lunch time, needing to retrieve the food I've been craving since morning. I barely even look as I pull open the door and reach for my lunch, preferring to stare tactfully at the space between Nagisa's head and the ceiling. She's talking to some girls again, not noticing my glances. She suddenly reddens considerably as one girl asks her a question, and I snort.

I suddenly am aware of how long I've taken to grab my bento box, and turn my attention to that task. In that instant, I discover that something large has been placed in my locker. Something red and pink, with a bit of white, something that has filled my entire locker with its sweet scent. Nagisa's bouquet.

I slowly turn to stare directly at Nagisa. She's red as the roses as she meets my gaze, and she squeaks and looks away again.

I feel as if a great weight has been lifted off my heart as I pick up the flowers and inhale deeply.

A rectangle object is dislodged and falls to the ground. I bend to pick it up. It's a tiny card, addressed to me in Nagisa's neat cursive.

_To Tomoya: Thank you for being so kind to me this past year. Thank you for watching over me and caring for me. Thank you for making me laugh. Thank you, and Happy Valentine's day!_

_From Nagisa_

I pause and smile before reading the rest.

_P.S. I love you._

* * *

"Tomoya-kun! _Tomoya-kun_!"

"What?!" My head jerks up from where it had been resting on the counter.

"Tomoya-kun, you really shouldn't sleep at work. You'll be fired if your boss catches you!" Nagisa chides, her voice not as stern as one might expect. She stops and scrutinizes my face. "Tomoya-kun, are you okay?"

I smile and look into her beautiful, brown eyes. There's no doubt in my mind of what I'm about to do. With the dream still fresh in my mind, I step around the counter and take both of her hands in my own. The words come easily to my lips, as if I've lived my entire life for this one moment. And maybe I have.

"I love you."

Her eyes glisten with tears.

"Nagisa, I love you."

She reaches up her fingers to touch my cheek, but my heart flares and I grab her hand, gently crushing her to my chest. She's sobbing now, sobbing into my shirt and mumbling something softly.

"Hm?" I query.

Her shining eyes meet mine in answer, and I know exactly what she's thinking.

_P.S. I love you._

I grin. "Happy Valentine's Day, Nagisa."

* * *

1) Yes, from where I come from, red roses do symbolize love/a crush, white ones a blooming friendship, and pink ones a strong friendship.

2) Yes, I DID actually pull this romantic trick on the guy I used to like when I was in 7th grade. He was a year older, and his class was raising money for the class trip to Washington D.C. One of their fund-raiser ideas was to sell flowers on Valentine's Day. He was one of the people who took flower orders. You can guess the rest. *heart*

3) Yes, I DID receive a secret admirer note like the one Nagisa wrote a year or two back. I stuffed it in a box, forgot about it, and found it this weekend while cleaning my room. It was too sweet to resist.

Thanks for reading and **REVIEW**ing!!!

~Star-chan

P.S. Behold my amazing German power: Nagisa ist sehr romantisch! Und du musst **REVIEW**, ja?


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